Last month I bought these pants as "goal pants". I tried them on, not knowing if they would fit and the did! They are more snug than I would like them to be, but they fit. Ever since then, they have been hanging, just like this, on my mirror as motivation. I see them everyday, several times a day. I have yet to try them on again. Not sure when I will. But I do know my ultimate goal is to wear them when I go to StL in June.
Last night I somehow developed the courage to put my bikini on and take a picture. I sent the picture to Mel as an accountability thing. Now today, I'm sharing it with all of you. Before I do though, please know I am a work in progress. I have never loved what I see when looking in the mirror wearing in a bikini or less. I wrote about that here. In the last three months I have been incorporating more strength training and less cardio into my gym routine. I am starting to see progress.
I posted this on IG a couple weeks ago. It didn't bother me, mostly because my upper body isn't my "problem area". I carry my weight in my hips and thighs. My upper body has never been especially strong, so I was excited to see this much progress.
As for the rest of me. Please know as I type this, I am having a huge internal debate with myself about pushing "publish". I know once it's out there, I can't take it back. Please be kind.
Please don't ask how much I weight, because I don't know. I use to get on the scale far too often. I'm talking several times a day. When I started incorporating weights into my workout routine, I stopped weighing myself. It wasn't easy, but I did it. I am trying not to focus so much on the number on the scale and more on how I feel. While I do feel better, I don't yet feel great. Like I said, I am a work in progress.
This is real.
This is me. And I have feelings.