Jumping Mental Hurdles

It's Wednesday!!  That means one thing... REST DAY!

I mentioned in my post yesterday about running outside.  I know for some of you, outside is the only place you run.  That's not the case for me.  When I first started running I couldn't run a mile without walking.  I remember getting into my car and calling my mom the first time I ran a mile on the treadmill without walking.  I was so proud of myself.  Slowly, I increased my speed and distances.  If I get on a treadmill now, I can easily crank out 4-5 miles at a 9:15/mile pace.

Outside is a different story.  

I struggle BIG TIME when I run outside.  

Running is incredibly hard for me mentally when I get outside. 

I have run through my neighborhood a few time, and I know if I go down every cal-de-sac it's a 2.84 mile loop.  Before Monday, that 2.84 miles was my limit outside {except for the one 5K I ran this past December}.  I know the streets in my neighborhood so well, that while running I can only think about how far I still have to go, and mentally, I cash out.  

Monday I tried something new.  I drove to an elementary school three miles from my house and ran along some paved trails my city has.  These trails are awesome.  The city has done an amazing job building trails all over the place.  If they wanted to, someone could actually run/walk/bike from one side of the city to the other on these trails. 

The route I ran Monday, had neighborhoods along it.  I turned into one of the neighborhoods thinking, "I've never been in here, let's check it out."  I figured I would just run down the sidewalks in this neighborhood and see where it took me.  Well, the neighborhood turned out to be bigger than I though and at one point I had to get my phone out and use the GPS feature to figure out how to get out of the neighborhood.  I had my Nike+ App running, but focused on not looking at it so I wouldn't psych myself out.  

It was a windy day and the neighborhood was hilly.  I was so afraid of burning myself out and still having to get back to my car that I cut that run shorter than I could have.  I was disappointed when I got back to my car, stopped my run, and felt like I could have kept going.  I was however satisfied with the 3.4 miles I had run feeling great!  It wasn't fast, but I was more focused on pacing myself for more distance than speed.  

I have 5 months to work on speed.

When I got home and really looked at the route I had run, I discovered I had run down all but about five streets in that neighborhood.  So, I set the goal for yesterday of running every street in that neighborhood, then coming out a different entrance and back to my car.  Knowing roughly what my running route would look like was mentally a HUGE mistake.  Having a visual image in my mind of roughly how many streets I had already run and how many I had left to do was mentally very hard for me.  

But, I didn't give up. 

I walked up a few hills that were really steep where the wind was blowing in my face and I thought I was going to die, but I didn't quit.   When I got back to my car and stopped my Nike+ App, I was thrilled to see I had gone 4.7 miles.  That was a new outside distance PR for me.  My fastest pace was a 9:17 mile and my slowest was a 10:32 mile.  Not to shabby.

I definitely learned that I do better when I don't have a set route planned.  My next outside run will be through a series of neighborhoods that all connect together.  I think I'll focus more on just running until I can't anymore and less on turing around when I think I might be at my "half way" point.  I don't know yet what my half way point feels like and I know I'm cheating myself out of doing more when I pick a point and think, "yea, this is probably half way, I should turn around now."  

I haven't officially started my death sentence half training yet.  Right now I am working on pushing away the negative thoughts of "I can't do this" to see what my body is really capable of.  The mental discomfort is my biggest challenge right now.  My breathing has been great and my legs feel fantastic when I'm pounding the pavement.

Slowly, but sure, I'll get to where I need to be for my half. I cannot express how excited I am about the group of friends I have coming to run this with me.  When I sent Holly a text yesterday asking if she was really coming out of retirement to run this with me, she replied with, "Of course!  I can't make you do it yourself!"   She's treasure!  

My next big running item -- buying a GPS watch.  I really want the Garmin 610, but don't want to fork over the dolla doll bills to get it.  Perhaps for now I'll stick with smaller purchases such as BodyGlide. You know, the necessities.  

Such is life....