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Friday, January 11, 2013

One, Two, Buckle My Shoe

Not being a mother, I have never had the joy of teaching my child how to tie his/her shoes.  However... being a teacher of children ranging from 5-11 years old, I know that usually around the age of 7 a child is able to master the art of shoe tying - as long as said child has had a parent work with him/her teaching the skill step by step.  Yes, I realize there are exceptions to this - I teach, remember?  Some children do not develop the fine motor skills needed for tying until later - and that's okay. 

What is not okay is a fully capable, able bodied, nine year old who is unable to tie his/her shoes and {here's the kicker} is unwilling to learn.

Yes, I said nine years old.  Where I live, that is a third grader.

This student of mine does not know how to tie, nor does he/she {trying to protect privacy here - incase my corner of the interwebz is discovered} have the desire to learn.

I told him/her that he/she needs to learn how to tie and the response was, "Nah."  Shock bolted through my body.  In all my years of teaching, I have never had a student who could not tie and had less than zero desire to learn!!  I'm sure if someone had a camera and took a picture of my face, you'd see pure shock.  I asked this student what he/she was going to do when he/she was 30 years old and unable to tie his/her shoes.  The reply - his/her mom would do it for him/her.

Yeah, I'm sure his/her mother will not only love tying her child's shoes when said child is 30, but also I'm sure she'll love having her child living with her when said child is 30, because I don't know many members of society with "unable to tie their own shoes" on their list of Qualities Of A Dream Spouse.

Being the awesomesauce teacher that I am, who truly cares about the future endeavors of my students, I informed unable-to-tie-nine-year-old that he/she needs to learn how to tie his/her shoes and if needed we can spend time during PE practicing.  Don't tell me I don't care about the future of America's youth.

You're welcome, society.

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